Caught in the Act
by BlackGeneralNocturna
Summary: Two Skull grunts decide to prank two Aether employees who are always foiling their plans. Unfortunately the spray paint runs out before they can finish the job. And the employees catch them at the scene of the crime. Then things turn REALLY weird. Warning strong language and ridiculous insults. This isn't supposed to be taken seriously. Very vaguely implied slash, implied femslash.


**Yeah I don't know what I was thinking with this. I just wrote as crap popped into my head. Warning, this is very bloody weird and random. If any punctuation is missing it's because the format screwed up and I tried fixing it at half 4 in the morning. So probably missed some things.**

"Have you got any more cans?" Alan the Skull grunt (who went by the codename Grunt) shouted to his fellow grunt Lila (also codenamed Grunt). She gave him her signature resting bitch face as she held out a black can and pressed the top, spraying a fine layer of black paint into his face and giving a pretty much unnoticeable smirk as he started coughing and cursing.

"That was the last of it, Al."

"Bitch."

"Jerk."

Alan sighed heavily as he looked at the half finished graffiti they had been spraying on the wall of the house of two Aether employees they knew fairly well. 'Aether lackeys are cun-' that's where it cut off due to no longer having any paint. He and his partner in crime (but not lover and partner because they dated for a short time and crap happened) loved causing mischief through graffiti. They painted on the stage in Iki Town 'Kahuna Hala is a pokephile' once and ended up in hospital after he sicked his Crabrawler on them. That didn't stop their cheeky streak though, and they had been injured many times for their beautiful art.

And now they were targeting the Aethers because two particular employees Cam and his younger sister Aria kept foiling their thieving attempts. So this would have been a big 'fuck you' to them but unfortunately their paint ran out. Arceus must despise them, always screwing them over like this.

"Alright, should we ask Kairu for some more paint?" he suggested, Lila pulled a face.

"I'm not asking HIM for anything. Last time I asked for something he told me I would only get it if I flashed my chest."

"And did you?"

"Of course not, idiot! Why don't we ask Basil or Cori or someone who's not a pervert?"

"Hey Cori is totally a pervert! She's always trying to catch my sexy body exposed!" Alan exclaimed with a narcissistic wink that made his female friend groan.

"Remind me to spray you red when we get the paint. Then Kairu will understand what happens to idiots." She quickly turned around as she heard a distant voice and Alan tilted his head.

"What's wrong?"

"I hear someone... Oh crap I think Cam and Aria are back!" Alan immediately looked and lo and behold, the employees they were pranking were coming back at the worst possible time. They didnt seem to notice them though, caught up in conversation as the younger aether chirped cheerfully hugging her Slowpoke close and the tall young man laughed in response whilst fussing over the spoiled Espeon rubbing her head on his leg. Alan was pretty sure that prissy little purple pussy was spoiled.

Always perfectly groomed and getting so much attention. Even when Cam was trying to be serious and deal with him, his attention was immediately diverted to that damn cat Pokemon. He saw that thing every day, why did he always ignore him to fuss over that stupid thing?

"Alan, smoke is coming out of your ears and you look like you want to murder that Espeon." Whoops. Smoke was coming out of his ears. Of course that should not be possible but they were fictional characters after all.

"I do. A psychic type should not be able to defeat my Haunter!"

"Shadow Ball."

"It doesnt even get STAB!"

And whilst the two skull grunts started arguing, the Aether siblings heard them and looked awkwardly at the scene.

"Why is Alan arguing with his girlfriend?" Aria murmured, her Slowpoke tilted his head as he watched his known enemies (Alan had tried kidnapping him many times and Lila assisted once or twice) engage in their verbal fight and Cam shook his head, his blank expression copied by his Espeon.

"She's not his girlfriend anymore, remember we saw her throw a chair at him in a Malasada restaurant five months ago." His face turned red when he noticed the graffiti on their wall. "Aether lackeys are- That better not mean-"" Aria watched awkwardly as her calm brother ran over to the grunts and she, Slowpoke and Espeon exchanged glances before shrugging and catching up with him.

To find him putting Alan in a headlock and Lila staring at them shocked.

"G-Get the fuck off me, cat boy!"

"Why the hell did you do such a thing, arsehole?! That's going to take ages to wash off!"

"Just get Slowpoke to use Hydro Pump! Oh wait, that Slowpoke's so weak it can't even use anything stronger than a Water Gun!"

Slowpoke looked very offended and Aria wanted to have a right lecture at the rude Skull boy but she knew if the trouble didn't stop soon, a war would break out. Of course though her mature(?) older brother didn't know that. Or he just didn't care.

"Say that again. If you fucking dare."

"That Slowpoke is almost as bad as your fashion sense."

And the brunet had the blunet on the ground pinned down, hands around his neck. Lila was about to interrupt when she thought better of it. No one was going to die. Probably.

"My fashion sense?! You look like you're trying WAY too hard to be some 'Edgy 'ard motherfucking boss', punk!"

"And you look like you got your 'futuristic' space man outfit from the same place Team Galactic got theirs!"

Aria and Lila looked awkwardly at each other.

"So... How's your week been?"

"At least we look adorable, Grimer! Oh wait, that's an insult to the poor things!"

"Been alright other than being surrounded by idiots 24/7."

"Adorable?! The girls, maybe, but you?! No way!"

"Umm Alan likes lying to himself doesn't he?"

"You're just jealous, future convict!"

"Yup... Uh..."

"As if, prissy boy! Why would I be jealous of your stupid dumb hat and your stupid ugly clothes and your stupid shiny eyes and stupid cute face and- Just shut up!"

Aria and Lila exchanged glances.

"This argument is getting weird."

"It's getting very fucking weird."

"Low life!"

"Goody two shoes!"

"Criminal!"

"Fuckboy!"

"Dickhead!"

"Pokephile!"

"What?! Where did that even- Team Rocket reject!"

Lila and Aria looked at each other again.

"Would you like to get malasada with me?" the Skull girl suggested, the Aether girl chirped happily in response.

"Alright!" The sensible minions ran off and Espeon looked between her pissed off master and his happy sister before yawning loudly. The young men stopped arguing for a second to yawn. They stared at each other confused then promptly passed out. Espeon sniggered to herself before chasing after Aria and Lila to snoop on their malasada date.


End file.
